eat, sleep, breathe, repeat

Apparently, Luca can count. One day he just started counting out loud and didn't stop until he got to 8. Our jaw just dropped to the floor.

He likes to say "nnnnnnnnnoooooooo" while raising his eyebrows and looking at you like "yeah right".

He also says "Nice." Like "Hey Luca I made you a sandwich" "OH! Nice."





He is very sweet and loves to give people hugs and kisses. He and his friend Leo actually played TOGETHER for the first time, chasing each other around and saying baby words to each other.

We went to the playground this morning, and he sat on my lap the whole time! This is not uncommon for him (though he is much more adventurous with daddy around). It's fine with me, since I'd rather be resting then chasing him all over the place. I hung out with some really great mamas.

I have been sleeping in my own room on the nights when I work evenings. Go figure, Luca actually sleeps better without me around. He is also sort of night weaned. As he nurses to sleep at night, I tell him "Remember, you get nursies in the morning when the sun comes up. Night time is for sleeping. If you wake up, we do cuddles and go night night. Then you get nursies when the sun comes up." And I stick to that. I say "night night, cuddle with mommy" when he wakes up, and I ignore him otherwise. He usually falls asleep on my arm or chest, and then I just remove him so I can sleep more comfortably.





We bought a futon!! This couch has such great vibes... we bought it from an artist, who bought it from a couple who traveled with it around the world. We only paid $75 for it, and the mattress is super fluffy and the frame is real sturdy and all wood. The pin that keeps the frame in the groove is coming out on one side, but some wood glue will fix that.

We did our taxes and were shocked to find out we will be getting back $5,000. This puts our tax rate at -23% (yes, negative). This is going to be a big help... we can now afford to buy our own used car. The car is the last big thing we depend on my parents for. If we sell Ash's guitar, we might also be able to afford solar panels for the house! It isn't so bad being poor if you're married and you have a kid. But it took this tax break, the food stamps, and my parents' help to make it through life bellow the poverty line. We were down to our last $20 at one point this year.

Ash and I got a lawyer to write our wills this week. We wanted the peace of mind that Luca would be raised by who we want him to be raised by, should we "perish in a common disaster" (as the will says). We also got livings wills saying we don't want our life prolonged if we have a terminal illness or are in a vegetative state. I also put on there that I want my organs all donated.

We have been reading a lot of Osho lately. This is causing some major shifts in our personal philosophies and it feels so good, but also a little scary... it feels good to grow, it only hurts when you resist. Fear hurts more than anything. As Osho says, a tree does not hurt as it grows... only humans have figured out how to be neurotic enough to make it painful!